…your idea of comforting a child involves using a papoose board.
…you think involuntary sterilization should be a requirement to get on welfare.
…you assume every patient with back pain is a drug-seeker until proven otherwise.
…you find yourself telling the Motrin overdose which of her medicines are really dangerous.
…you think there should be a DRG code for “Too Stupid to Live.”
…lost vibrators and lost condoms are so routine you don’t even bother to gossip about them.
…you consider it a compliment when certain patients swear at you.
…you automatically hold your breath as you prep the patient for the pelvic exam.
…you’ve told a crying drunken driver that God was trying to kill him, but God missed.
…you know what Norbest Syndrome, Porcelain Titer, Feather Count, and FOS Syndrome mean.